Is it warm in here, or is it just me?

I like camping with Donna, Mark and Lesa. But sometimes we stay outside too long having dinner, talking, playing speed Scrabble and not wanting to be the first one to call it a night (or early evening) and climb into our respective vans. Instead we wait until someone (me) complains of frozen feet and cramping fingers and wimps out.

Here’s what I’ve discovered, though. It’s easier to get warm in my van when I don’t start out frozen. (Duh.) And the van doesn’t need to be very warm in order to make me feel warm. Fifty degrees is fine if my toes aren’t numb, but eighty isn’t warm enough if they are.

Some van dwellers have problems keeping their vans warm at night because they’re allergic to propane and haven’t found a workable alternative. My advice is to live as if you were going to sleep outside. That means dressing to stay warm all day. Even if that means looking like you're on an expedition to the South Pole. Don’t get cold in the first place. Don’t look to warm up via some external means. Use your 98-degree body heat as your furnace. Wrap it in layers of wool, down or modern heat-trapping fibers. You might find yourself getting too warm in your unheated van. Imagine that. Remove a layer. Or two. But keep your head covered. Those old-timey pictures of people wearing night caps? They knew a few things about keeping warm at night in unheated houses.

Way back when I was a Boy Scout, I was taught not to sleep in my clothes when it was cold. I don’t know whether this idea came from Baron Baden-Powell or the Marquis de Sade, a.k.a. my scoutmaster. I ignore it, because getting dressed in the cold sucks. And because I’m an adult and can do what I want. And because my clothes are another layer to hold in body heat.

Scouting also claimed that a few layers of newspaper between me and frozen ground would act as insulation. Yeah, for about half a second. Novice van dwellers soon realize all the insulation they installed can only do so much. You know how ice eventually melts in a cooler? Well, a van will eventually reach the outside temperature. So rather than fighting to keep the whole van warm, keep only yourself warm, with your own body.